Five-year-old Barred Plymouth Rock Hen, living in the hen house at the end of the cul-de-sac, is seeking a Rhode Island Red rooster who lives within crowing distance.
My Self Summary: Hi! I’m Blanche. I’m looking for a gorgeous mate who doesn’t sport a mullet (like the black Silky that lives in my coop), has excellent taste in plumage, and stands taller than me. I am a buxom gal with ladylike features and mixed complexion. I am proud of my full-figured body and ample breast meat. Don’t be fooled by my black and white biker-girl feathers, because the truth is, I’m more Taylor Swift than Joan Jett. And sooner or later, I will write a song about a breakup that’s my fault.
My Details: I am a Plymouth Rock—a true American patriot. My face is cardinal red and my single comb has a sassy little curve at the base. My skin color is a lovely hue of yellow and I’m told my eyes are the deep red-orange of a desert sunset. I have sturdy, scaly and rather sexy legs. My weight…I would rather not talk about. I am a prolific, year-round layer, and am often complemented on the size and golden brown color of my shells. When others ask if I get broody, I tell them it is none of their damn business.
What I’m Doing with my Life: After years of runway modeling and backyard scratching, I’ve decided to settle down, but my coop mates tell me I’m looking for love in all the wrong places…that’s why I joined Scratch.com.
The First Things People Usually Notice About Me: My wit. I tend to draw others in with my barnyard banter.
Quote: “I’m all that and a bag of scratch!”
Book: On my nightstand I have a copy of THE CHICKEN WHO SAVED US, starring one of my distant relatives. I highly recommend it!
Movie: Chicken Run is a coop favorite. I most identify with Ginger, the heroine who challenges a smooth-talking Rhode Island Red named Rocky. “There’s a better place out there…” has become my new mantra.
Food: I’m passionate about organic feed, watermelon rinds, freeze dried meal- worms, and I am happy to peck before marriage.
My perfect first date: would be to wake before sunrise to the sound of a handsome cockerel calling my name while dancing and flinging delicious morsels of food for me.
Kristin Jarvis Adams is a public speaker and advocate for children with special needs, helping to bridge the gap between the outside world and the inner world of autism. Her speaking engagements have included: Seattle Festival of Trees Gala, a benefit for Seattle Children’s Hospital and The Seattle Children’s Autism Clinic. Learn More>>